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Get what you want by asking “Why Not?”

What I learned from 100 days of Rejection

Jia Jiang adventures boldly into a territory so many of us fear: rejection. By seeking out rejection for 100 days — from asking a stranger to borrow $100 to requesting a “burger refill” at a restaurant — Jiang desensitized himself to the pain and shame that rejection often brings and, in the process, discovered that simply asking for what you want can open up possibilities where you expect to find dead ends.

We Often Learn About Rejection in our Childhood

I love this video. The idea of just taking “why not’ is fascinating when it comes to getting what you want. Bypassing the feelings of shame, no longer caring what other people think – to be able to stop being a people pleaser, those qualities seem borderline supernatural.

I remember the first time I knew that I was different. I learned it from my classmates. I won’t go into the detailed list of things they pointed out that were wrong with me – I think we all have those lists – but by being shamed by my parents and classmates, I learned to live in fear of rejection and shame. Each culture has a set of norms that we are expected to fit into. Granted, in America we don’t have conformism that is as strong as it in in Japan where students are forced to dye their hair black – including exchange students – in order to blend in. But I don’t want to veer too far off course in this article. The point of this post is that we can get what we want in life if don’t act out of a place of fear. There have been studies that show the way we overcome our fear is to face it.

Here are some common ways to overcome fear:

  1. Visualize Yourself as Unafraid.
  2. Practice Acting “As If”.
  3. Use the Law of Reversibility.
  4. Confront Your Fears Immediately.
  5. Move Toward the Fear.
  6. Deal With the Fear Directly.

Facing the Unknown

I believe that one of the things that can be scary about starting something new is the unknown. It can be very easy to stay stuck because at least where you are currently at is “known”. Misery can become comfortable and it can keep us from achieving new goals. At iteach we can’t to equip you with tools and resources to become the best teacher you can be. Check out these tips if you are dealing with fear.

Your Students Deal with Fear Too

As a teacher it is good to remember that your students have a lot going on in their lives. They can be afraid of failure, disappointing parents, or even fear of other classmates. If you keep this in mind when teaching you can be a powerful tool to help them overcome their fears. Sometimes just an encouraging word can help a student step out of a place of fear and into a place of confidence.

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